The Reveal.

reached home. dad rushed to the kitchen. azan maghrib is almost over and we still haven't break our fast yet. i spent another 45 seconds untie-ing(?) my pink high-cut converse shoes before i could enter the house. mom was not at the door. put my bags aside and heads to the kitchen. mom sat at one corner of the table, munching down some dates. she looked tired and moody. she stared at me. at my hair. she didn't say a word. so i sat down and ate. we talked. i asked her about my baju raya since the tailor said she'd finished the baju by today. and she showed me the baju. hoho i'm in love. and we talked about raya and stuff. finished eating, i took a quick shower and did my maghrib prayer in my room. i walked out to the living room and she's sitting on the couch watching TV. she asked me, "did the autie 'kikis' your hair?" and i told her the whole story about how the auntie butchered my hair. but i don't think i did a good job explaining and re-acting the moments because she continued to be.. uninterested.

aihhhhh she don't like it. no. no. i'm gonna get a lecture afterwards. that's what i thought. i tried the baju kurung and showed it to her, in attempt to make her like, lighten up a bit. but the shoulder part of the baju kurung is a bit snuggy and i don't feel comfortable at all >__< but the baju is pretty so i guess i'll wear it anyway. but she seemed a bit disappointed when i complaint about the baju to her. fyi, this year we tried a new tailor since our regular tailor suka buat hal. she over-charge us for her service and suka delay in finishing our baju. the baju my sister sent to her that was meant to be worn on last year's Eid just got finished last saturday. but the thing is, she does her job so well that we can't really complaint LOL. but yeah i still think the baju kurung would be awesomer if we sent it to our regular tailor. owh moving on,  i got into the kitchen to finish making and baking the last batch of the compulsory raya cookies. she entered the kitchen and showed me where she kept the empty bottles to put the biscuits in. I GOT ANNOYED AND IMPATIENT. I NEED A CLARIFICATION. so i asked her; giggling and smily faced, preparing myself for a cynical lecture.

Me: "mama, tak de comments ke?" *swinging my head side to side*

Mom: "LAWA. DAH KELUAR DUIT SERATUS LEBIH MANA TAK LAWA. MAMA PANDANG KAN JE TADI. DAH MACAM JEPUN DAH. AWAK MANA ADA MUKA MELAYU."

Me: hohohoho ♥

 so i sat down by the table dan buat biskut raya sampai pukul 10:30 pm tadi. :'D

kalau saya tak da muka melayu, saya muka apa D: tiba-tiba depressed due to moodlet "i don't know where i belong" and "i don't fit in here". saya memang selalu kena panggil 'ah moi', 'jepun', 'korea', and latest, 'european'. HAHAHA. the latter memang x boleh belah. when i shop for stuff, sometimes i got mistaken for a chinese and they tried talking to me in kantonese/chinese/hokkien etc and i'll just stare at them and make my O__O;; i don't understand le face. saya bukan putih pun =__= gelap je. nampak putih pun kalau lighting chantekk. hidung saye pun penyek je. ye saye x suka hidung saya =3= tapi kadang2 saya rasa ia comel so lantak la i'm stuck with it anyway xD the point is, i think i like being atypical. ambiguous. it's like i'm something, but i'm something else. ehehe. saya rasa macam ninja. it's not like i'm not proud being a malay, butttttt i don't think i am a pure blooded malay. i mean, does pure blooded malays even exist? i don't know about those royal bloods and all, but i remembered my highschool told me something about the malaysian initial population; it being consisting of aboriginals and immigrants from Java and Sumatera. well i know that my dad's side of the family has something to do with the Java Sumatera Indonesia lineage. (seriously i don't really ask my dad about all these, i just listen to him talk sometime, occasionally.) my mom's side? i think mom mentioned something about Bugis and Bajau Laut but i'm not sure if she was serious or was just joking =__= aihhh maybe i'll ask my parents about this properly and blog about it later. whatever it is, saya suka pakai skinny jeans. and since skinny jeans + malay = rempit, i'm really, really am glad that i don't really look like those rempit-ish malay. gehehehe. ahh tapi saya tahu kadang2 saya memang nampak macam minah rempit pun. One Malaysia? puhlessssse. i'm more on a GLOBAL terms.

aihhh saya nak sangat upload gambar rambut baru tapi saya tak ada USB cable =3=

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yes pictures. all camwhores ngehehe thanks dazye for uploading these