Gooooodddddddd.

i know how to make myself feel good. real gooooooddd.

ehehe.

what i mean is, i know how to take care of myself, spoiling myself to the absolute extend. just now i had to walk home in the rain. seriously though, i don't get why people curse the rain so much. yeah, you get wet. soaked. drenched. cold. maybe you'll get feverish. always the bad side of things. what about the good side? the humidity and temperature is just awesome for an extended-afternoon nap. i like how things always seems to move slowly when it rains. it's calm. i can actually see people moving at the same pace as me. no rush. well some of them do run to find shelter from the rain, but the lazy, clouded, damp atmosphere is very relaxing. so what else you could do on an awesome rainy day?

i got myself a steamy hot chocolate and blueberry waffles :'D

it goes so well with the rain that i actually thought that not going to the SS3 isn't such a big deal. but then again, it is a big deal to me LSDJFSLDKD. but seriously, the little bit of happiness that you can get yourself - it's always there. you just have to look harder. lol you don't have to look that hard at all xD sometimes you think that life sucks. life always have its way of messing with you. it's you against the world. i was once like that. back then. but we're not gonna live forever ya know, so let's make peace with the world. this is probably why i was sad yesterday, when i couldn't find the proper way to treat myself of those leech bites D': and there was no one here who can help me.

"happiness is drinking hot chocolate on a cold day."

got that from a shoujo manga too. there's too many things i could do to spoil myself. i actually had this thought to starve myself because i gain 5 effing kgs during raya SLKFDJLSDJF but. i hate being being miserable. so i ate. :'D all of my binge eating problem? it's probably due to these things. wanting to spoil myself. spoiling myself good. it is selfish. making yourself feel so good, while knowing someone out there is probably dying out of misery. should be a sin. but there's no point in waiting someone else to do those things for you. no one ever showed up at my door at 3 in the morning with some McD fries and coke. no one ever gave me those cute little japanese candy that i saw in One Utama. no one would ever come and shove marshmallow down my throat out of the blue. so i don't care. i don't want to be saved by others. i'm content with what i have now. but i'm looking forward to more. I ARE NEEDS MOAR HAPPINEHHHSSS.

patut la i'm feeling a bit needy. it's your birthday dammit.
happy birthday my first love :'D LSKJFLSDKJFLS