i'm gonna get so fucking moody once i get - IF I GET pregnant lol. hmm. awkward intro is awkward as well as totally unrelated and irrelevant lol.
hello Malaysian people. i am in Brisbane now. or is it Queensland? whatever. i never cared.
I LOVE IT HERE.
no i am not missing home. i know i'm thousands of miles away from home and all, but i feel absolutely awesome here. i do admit that i'm quite slow digesting things, but now, right now, i am fully aware that i am here, a place where you Malaysian people call 'overseas' lol. i'm not trying to sound cocky or anything, and sorry if it does lol but tbqh i don't think it's a big deal. yes it's Australia. yes i'm studying overseas. but lol it's just studying. and i hate studying. but i must study :'D and that is how / why i got here lol. yeah i lack determination but that is how i roll. ahhh i should really start studying seriously, as in, seriously studying.
class is starting tomorrow and as usual, i'm freaking out. CAMPUS IS BIG. and i have like, 10 minutes break before the next lecture, just to run around finding my next lecture / prac / contact / tutorial whatever. yes i feel stressed Q__Q i am stressed thinking about how hectic my campus life would be, even before the class commences. alkjdlkadjklsa. oh i'm stressed that i don't have a house too. i want Carmody in case you haven't heard. it's close to Hawken Drive and i love Hawken Drive. the place is like, small and lively lol. ye lah maybe you Brisbane Queensland UQ people prefers the City and South Bank and all but i love Hawken Drive. OTL
my poor feet is awesomely sunburned. why do i have such sucky skin. it's dark but it gets sunburned easily. stupid retarded melanin. Y U NO PROTECT ME FROM SKIN CANCER
the food generally sucks. mainly because of the fact that i can't eat McD here lol. it's quite hard to find awesome HALAL food here. saya tak nak makan babi lol. so look out Australia, Intan is cooking. somewhat cooking lol. haih. but tbqh again i think i could go and eat stuff wherever, as long as it's not poultry or meat or anything. hmmm. oh and it looks like i'll be getting a new pair of legs. the roads here are like, so awesomely berbukit-bukit that a simple walk to the konbini feels like hiking. which is awesome D: i really want to go out and jog. and the people here are cute and tall D: koreans pun ada. i still have some of my awesome friends here, and i shall make more awesome friends. I WILL TRY.
uhhh what else.
DAMMIT I LOVE BRISBANE D:
mom and dad please don't miss me too much. it's making me feel guilty because i am not missing home that much lol
// there's a ferry here. and there's a ferris wheel also. all i need now is a giraffe.
THE FUCK I WANT A GIRAFFE
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Delusional.
>> Aiden
>> Eric
>> Sloan
>> Gale
>> Brendon
>> Damien
>> Joel
>> Benji
>> Andy
>> Jared
>> Hadyn
>> Niel
// i don't have any awesome girl names.
// my French name is Bijou so call me B from now on
// then again i'm not a French person
// i am a B blood type person though
/// u know what Edward and Jacob were cool names
// Harry was never cool though
// Adel
// Bijou
// Allen
// Amber
// Ruby
// Biel
// ahh Aiden and Biel sounds awesome
>> Eric
>> Sloan
>> Gale
>> Brendon
>> Damien
>> Joel
>> Benji
>> Andy
>> Jared
>> Hadyn
>> Niel
// i don't have any awesome girl names.
// my French name is Bijou so call me B from now on
// then again i'm not a French person
// i am a B blood type person though
/// u know what Edward and Jacob were cool names
// Harry was never cool though
// Adel
// Bijou
// Allen
// Amber
// Ruby
// Biel
// ahh Aiden and Biel sounds awesome
I Lost it.
7 days from now, i won't be here. omigosh omigosh. but seriously, is it that much of a great thing studying overseas? you know, i tried to put on my excited and nervous face; but then i thought, "well, it's not like i'm leaving forever. most of my friends completed their first years overseas, and i met them, and like, nothing has changed. IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL." would i look like a dork if i come off as 'excited nak fly?' =3=
ummm. of course i'm leaving my friends, but it's not like it's forever. i left my friends from primary and secondary school for like, a decade now since i've saw them? i can't believe i feel somewhat guilty for not seeing them before saya berambus. am i at fault? i don't know lol.
i am really THAT emotionally retarded =3=
oh i lost Aiden's receipt FML
ummm. of course i'm leaving my friends, but it's not like it's forever. i left my friends from primary and secondary school for like, a decade now since i've saw them? i can't believe i feel somewhat guilty for not seeing them before saya berambus. am i at fault? i don't know lol.
i am really THAT emotionally retarded =3=
oh i lost Aiden's receipt FML
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Turn a Blind Eye.
help me help me my conscience is killing me.
right now i'm at this place. and in this place, something very wrong is going on. i'm totally against the wrong that is being committed. but i can't exactly get angry with the person committing the wrong doing. it is a very complicated situation. so for now, i choose to turn a blind eye.
and that itself is a wrong doing coming from me.
i don't want to lose myself. please pray for me
right now i'm at this place. and in this place, something very wrong is going on. i'm totally against the wrong that is being committed. but i can't exactly get angry with the person committing the wrong doing. it is a very complicated situation. so for now, i choose to turn a blind eye.
and that itself is a wrong doing coming from me.
i don't want to lose myself. please pray for me
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Spirited Away.
ah yes =w= i should be leaving soon. today it's Monday, the 7th. clicked the calender thing at the bottom right of the desktop then goes into panic mode. 18th is like, the next week punya Friday. *continues panicking* i haven't packed. seriously. i haven't gone out to an all out shopping trip. i've sorted out my clothes and all but i don't know which one should i bring @__@ will it be hot over there? will it be cold? liek, freezing cold? no it won't. it would be pretty much the same as Malaysia, i know. it should be a bit cold and dry because of the lack of humidity, and the occasional cold wind, or something. but i wouldn't know for sure. i haven't been there before lol. i'm trying to be calm. M*** had put me through a lot of uncertainties. so seriously, i've come to a point where just don't care anymore. don't ask me when is my flight, because things could still change. don't ask me where i'll be staying, because things could still change. nothing is fixed. nothing is confirmed. it sucks to have your fate in the hands of God knows who OTL
i'm all good. i'm still somewhat sane. i'm not too sure i could say the same for my parents. i'm sure that in their eyes, i'm taking things too lightly. but what can i do lol. i'm trying my best hanging on to all the uncertainties thrown at me. i'm fine with uncertainties dammit. i shall look at them as adventures (=w=)b ah yes my parents are awesome. they would whine about all the uncertainties is and stuff that i have to go through to all my relatives; from the miscommunication with my sponsors to the flood situation in Queensland. it's all true, of course. but i'm sure when all of those phail stories fall on another ear, the one listening would go liek, "ah, susahnye nak fly. belajar dalam negara lagi senang." //stabs self.
i've managed to organize my timetable awesomely. so far i've managed to sign on to all of the lecture streams i wanted. seriously, some days i would feel fail. and some days i would feel lucky. awesomely lucky. i was supposed to sign on for a lecture and tutorial for PSYC1020 at 8 am Australian time. being the failure that i am, i thought 8 am Australian is 9 am Malaysian when it's actually 6 am haha. so i set my alarm for 8:30 am and went to sleep at 6:15 am. but somehow, i woke up at 7:30 am and got the last spot in the L1 stream; the awesome last spot. i know it's a simple thing but i'm so happy lol. the feeling is comparable to when i won a SONY MP3 player in a lucky draw last year haha.
ahhh i can't wait to leave for Aussie. the thought of leaving the things that you have since you were born sounds, exciting. somewhat like Nomiya shedding of his suit of adolescence and turning to a full fledge adult in Honey and Clover the anime series season 2 lol. ahh i've never attained the thing you guys called 'independence' for as long as i was staying in Subang - for a period of 2.5 years. lets face it, i've never been financially independent from my parents, even when i have my monthly allowance from M***. i am a spoiled. i spent too much. my parents loved me, showered me with so much luxury until i've become like this lol. ahh don't get me wrong, i'm not blaming them for spoiling me. but i'm hoping when i get Aussie i can be more independent? lol no choice no choice. i work better under stress, under the lack of resource. so for sure i will impose better self control on myself yes ZETTAI NI (=w=)v i can do this i can do this. ah on a completely different note, i don't work well with limits. i can do stuff more that required so 'limit' is no good for me haha.
Spirited Away. good movie is good. the black soot spirits are cute. i want to fall in love with a river spirit. ah nanti saya duduk sebelah sungai Brisbane so a Caucasian river spirit pun jadilah.
 |
| 'Promised Reunion' by arriku |
Monday, February 7, 2011
Facebook and Family.
I HATE SEEING MY FAMILY ON FACEBOOK.
but so far i've only added my brother lol. but i hide my wall posts from him because i was sorta feeling like insecure. but he hides his wall from me too so it's all good. but still, i hate seeing my relatives on facebook (excluding my siblings). a cousin of mine added me the other day and i didn't even hesitated to ignore her request. just, no lol. family on facebook can be really messy.
*cracks knuckles*
i have this auntie L from my mother's side of the family. she was divorced by uncle L - uncle L was a playa lol. they have 5 children, the oldest is the same age my brother, or something. the second is the same age as my sister, and the third is the same age as myself. we weren't that close or anything, but we're alright i guess. cousins are funny things. they are family, but yet they aren't really lol. hmmm. auntie L had to go through a hard time supporting her family as a single parent, since uncle L was busy with another bitch - he didn't even gave her the monthly compensation ( or something ) that he was supposed to give. irresponsible dumb fuck. he was also quite abusive when he was married to auntie T, so needless for me to say, i hate his guts lol. atuk never liked uncle T, because uncle T was really an asshole. he'd done something in the past which i'm not sure what but yeah nobody likes him and all of us really wanted him to die lol.
but recently, uncle T was left by his bitch after all of his money was sucked out of him, and he's fallen sick with some disease or something i don't really care. but he's close to dying la. and now, he wants to go back to auntie T. ah wait i don't think i made uncle T sound really like an asshole lol. uhh there was this one time when his oldest daughter saw him walking with his bitch in a mall somewhere. she said hi to him and he was like, pretended not to know his own daughter. yes yes does he sounds more like an asshole now? he had like, piercings and all lol piercings are cool but dude, you're like, 3/4 dead. please don't.
so yeah, auntie T is actually considering to take back uncle T. she came home to see atuk last CNY to straighten things out, as in, (consult?) her other siblings. but of course, no one agreed lol. when that asshole left auntie T, all of my other aunties pitched in, sending her some monthly allowance or something. my mom was the loudest of all her siblings, and strongly rejected the idea of auntie T re-marrying uncle T. but my cousin, the one who's the same age as me, defended uncle T, saying that she wants her family back as a whole. my mom was screaming some sense into her, reminding her how hard life was when uncle T left them with nothing. they've survived without him then, why should they accept him now? when he's all sick and dying? ahhh yes karma is awesome. but i understand what my cousin was trying to say though. all she wanted is to have her family back. a dad and a mom. this is her family, so why do u people busy butting in? ahh but my mom would say something like, if it wasn't for us, your relatives, you and your family wouldn't have survived. where do you think the money you got for food came from? or something like that.
i'm not gonna analyze anything and come up with a brilliant conclusion for the drama, i just want to point out how awesome facebook can affect lives lol. so after auntie T went back to her house in KL, some rumors became viral. the oldest daughter of auntie T was so damn upset about what my mom told auntie T, and she was backlashing my mom on facebook lol. i don't know who, but someone told someone told someone until my mom knew about it. my mom do own a facebook but she never added that cousin of mine. and my mom was like, asking me to find that particular cousin of mine punya facebook so she can read it herself. but no matter how awesome i was at stalking, tracking people down, i didn't want to partake in the drama lol. i just told mom to leave it alone. but then i saw her utilizing the search box - but failed. haiz.
i really don't wanna see any of my relatives on facebook.
but so far i've only added my brother lol. but i hide my wall posts from him because i was sorta feeling like insecure. but he hides his wall from me too so it's all good. but still, i hate seeing my relatives on facebook (excluding my siblings). a cousin of mine added me the other day and i didn't even hesitated to ignore her request. just, no lol. family on facebook can be really messy.
*cracks knuckles*
i have this auntie L from my mother's side of the family. she was divorced by uncle L - uncle L was a playa lol. they have 5 children, the oldest is the same age my brother, or something. the second is the same age as my sister, and the third is the same age as myself. we weren't that close or anything, but we're alright i guess. cousins are funny things. they are family, but yet they aren't really lol. hmmm. auntie L had to go through a hard time supporting her family as a single parent, since uncle L was busy with another bitch - he didn't even gave her the monthly compensation ( or something ) that he was supposed to give. irresponsible dumb fuck. he was also quite abusive when he was married to auntie T, so needless for me to say, i hate his guts lol. atuk never liked uncle T, because uncle T was really an asshole. he'd done something in the past which i'm not sure what but yeah nobody likes him and all of us really wanted him to die lol.
but recently, uncle T was left by his bitch after all of his money was sucked out of him, and he's fallen sick with some disease or something i don't really care. but he's close to dying la. and now, he wants to go back to auntie T. ah wait i don't think i made uncle T sound really like an asshole lol. uhh there was this one time when his oldest daughter saw him walking with his bitch in a mall somewhere. she said hi to him and he was like, pretended not to know his own daughter. yes yes does he sounds more like an asshole now? he had like, piercings and all lol piercings are cool but dude, you're like, 3/4 dead. please don't.
so yeah, auntie T is actually considering to take back uncle T. she came home to see atuk last CNY to straighten things out, as in, (consult?) her other siblings. but of course, no one agreed lol. when that asshole left auntie T, all of my other aunties pitched in, sending her some monthly allowance or something. my mom was the loudest of all her siblings, and strongly rejected the idea of auntie T re-marrying uncle T. but my cousin, the one who's the same age as me, defended uncle T, saying that she wants her family back as a whole. my mom was screaming some sense into her, reminding her how hard life was when uncle T left them with nothing. they've survived without him then, why should they accept him now? when he's all sick and dying? ahhh yes karma is awesome. but i understand what my cousin was trying to say though. all she wanted is to have her family back. a dad and a mom. this is her family, so why do u people busy butting in? ahh but my mom would say something like, if it wasn't for us, your relatives, you and your family wouldn't have survived. where do you think the money you got for food came from? or something like that.
i'm not gonna analyze anything and come up with a brilliant conclusion for the drama, i just want to point out how awesome facebook can affect lives lol. so after auntie T went back to her house in KL, some rumors became viral. the oldest daughter of auntie T was so damn upset about what my mom told auntie T, and she was backlashing my mom on facebook lol. i don't know who, but someone told someone told someone until my mom knew about it. my mom do own a facebook but she never added that cousin of mine. and my mom was like, asking me to find that particular cousin of mine punya facebook so she can read it herself. but no matter how awesome i was at stalking, tracking people down, i didn't want to partake in the drama lol. i just told mom to leave it alone. but then i saw her utilizing the search box - but failed. haiz.
i really don't wanna see any of my relatives on facebook.
My Favorite Color.
My favorite color is not red and purple lol. i caught up with the blogspot font fad and changed mine OTL. but since my last layout was too awesome and weird, blogspot won't let me have those awesome fonts too. so i need the revamp my blog from scratches, deleted every customization that i ever did just to get the fonts lol. ah but i'm not regretting it. i'm tired of my last layout too. also, this current layout is so simple, i can forever tweak it to my heart's content. after some minor adjustment, (making sure the text are perfectly aligned, centered, etc) i think i'm satisfied for now lol. excuse the red and purple. i was picking out some random colors and i thought they contrast very well with each other, so yeah.
i'm blogging less these days. when i blog less, it means i'm happy lol. some sort of happy la. i was venting my rants and random thoughts to people i can catch on facebook chats. facebook chats are addictive. much more addictive than regular facebook notifications. // slaps self
i bought Damien today. he is a wristwatch. i wanted to take a photo but the photo sucks at describing his real color lol. he's like, metallic silver, but he's so shiny that he actually looks black; tinted with some gold details. one time he could look like silver, and black in the next. ambiguous. mysterious. very shiny hueueue. i am also the proud owner of Aiden. Aiden is my white VAIO ♥ i wanted Jared ( a MacPro ) or little Jared Jr ( a MacBook ) but my dad said those are too expensive ( eventhough M*** gave me enough money lol ) so i settled for Aiden. Aiden is still awesome. haihh. but the cost of Aiden and Damien combined could get me a little Jared Jr =3= uhhh no regrets.
but now i's so in love in Damien. i can't wait for the 10th so i can go pick up Adam ( my new specs ) lol. and today, i think i can say what my favorite color is without hesitation lol. for now, i think it's the combination of these three colors: silver, black and gold. but they gold can be substituted with any bright vibrant colors. pink is good. purple is good. red is good. blue is good. anything. hahhhh. i can't wait to write about something more meaningful to life. for now, all i have are craps and rants lol.
i'm blogging less these days. when i blog less, it means i'm happy lol. some sort of happy la. i was venting my rants and random thoughts to people i can catch on facebook chats. facebook chats are addictive. much more addictive than regular facebook notifications. // slaps self
i bought Damien today. he is a wristwatch. i wanted to take a photo but the photo sucks at describing his real color lol. he's like, metallic silver, but he's so shiny that he actually looks black; tinted with some gold details. one time he could look like silver, and black in the next. ambiguous. mysterious. very shiny hueueue. i am also the proud owner of Aiden. Aiden is my white VAIO ♥ i wanted Jared ( a MacPro ) or little Jared Jr ( a MacBook ) but my dad said those are too expensive ( eventhough M*** gave me enough money lol ) so i settled for Aiden. Aiden is still awesome. haihh. but the cost of Aiden and Damien combined could get me a little Jared Jr =3= uhhh no regrets.
but now i's so in love in Damien. i can't wait for the 10th so i can go pick up Adam ( my new specs ) lol. and today, i think i can say what my favorite color is without hesitation lol. for now, i think it's the combination of these three colors: silver, black and gold. but they gold can be substituted with any bright vibrant colors. pink is good. purple is good. red is good. blue is good. anything. hahhhh. i can't wait to write about something more meaningful to life. for now, all i have are craps and rants lol.
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